Vaginal Hygiene Redefined-->A woman’s panacea for lagging sex appeal.

Did you know that over 60% of American women suffer from low bedroom swagger? It’s true. According to a recent GNO poll, men are becoming increasingly dissatisfied with their sex lives (GNO= Guys Night Out). What were their complaints, you ask? Here are the recurring ones and their relative importance (in percents) to bedroom swagger:

*Their lover lacks sexual aggression (25%)

*Their lover never takes initiative to perform fellatio (fellatio means blow job ;-) (30%)

*Their lover practices poor vaginal hygiene (45%)

First, a disclaimer: all of the aforementioned issues are equally important in spite of what the percentages suggest. Hence, you should address all of these issues. Your individual percentage ranking in these areas might be vastly different from those listed above. The percentage ranking listed above is an average ranking intended to give the uninformed woman a framework through which she can analyze her bedroom swagger. This said, the majority of women with lagging sex appeal probably have percentage rankings that mirror those above.

Proceed.

By far, the most devilish saboteur of bedroom swagger is poor vaginal hygiene. OM (Fucking) G. The worse thing that an unwitting man could do is deep-sea dive into a landfill. Unsavory tastes/smells coming from the vaginal orifice is a ‘cardinal sin’ at ‘Bedside Baptist’. Here’s why. There are unspoken rules in bedroom decorum that are designed to maximize sexual pleasure and to fend off “awkward moments”. A few examples: Thou shall not pass gas. Thou shall not laugh while having sex. Thou shall not call thy lover by another name. One of the most basic yet important of these unspoken rules is the one that forbids man/woman from having sex without showering. A violation here is akin to calling your lovers’ mother a whore—to her face! Lol. Maybe it is not that extreme but you get the idea.

This discovery might come as bad news for those women with naturally tart vaginas (talk to your family gynecologist). Nevertheless, for all other women, this discovery holds promising implications. While poor vaginal hygiene kills your sex appeal in the bedroom, great vaginal hygiene boosts your sex appeal tenfold! Great vaginal hygiene makes you delicious. It makes you tempting and undeniable. If you think I am exaggerating, try it. I can guarantee that your man will go down on you more often if he has a pleasant experience (the reverse is true if he has a bad experience). Moreover, his estimation of your worth will increase because he perceives you as a woman with high standards and higher maintenance requirements.

Before you go looking for ways to improve your vaginal hygiene, you must consider the following caveat. If you cast a line in the sea of information looking for vaginal-hygiene advice you might be instructed to

*Not douche

*Not wear baby powder

*Not use soap near the vaginal opening

While some of this advice is based in logic (e.g. suggested to prevent yeast infections), you should be wary about how closely you follow it. I say this because advice that, for example, instructs you not to use soap near your vagina has drawbacks (imagine if you never used soap when washing under your arms). Here is what I recommend:

*Talk to your family gynecologist

*Wash your vagina immediately before sex (you can intuit when you are about to have sex…right before that 'special moment', excuse yourself to the bathroom)

*Use pH balanced soap on your vaginal area (see gynecologist for specific advice on soaps)

*Light, perfumes/powders are not the enemy! Use them, in moderation, to enhance your smell

*Clean yourself well after using the restroom

*Do the self-check! (Dip your finger in your own vagina then smell and taste it. This is your proxy for what your lover will experience when he does it.)

The takeaway: Practice good vaginal hygiene. Everyone benefits from it: your lover, yourself (in terms of self-esteem and sex appeal), and your gynecologist (that mask has limitations, lol).

~DonnyBrook